When the Doctor Said "No Babies"
Apr 07, 2021
By Melissa Jan
I remember the day I was told that the % of getting pregnant was well below zero...
I was around the age of 18 and when I was told I wouldn’t be able to carry my own baby. I immediately felt a sense of shame and that there was something wrong with me. I never shared this information with anyone, not my mom or my sister. I was ashamed that my body couldn’t produce what other woman’s could.
This isn’t my first time telling the story, but it may be the first time for you reading it. I often get asked what are the reasons for not being able to conceive. I am very transparent about my story and once I was told “no babies” I accepted what my doctor told me, which was that due to my Epilepsy and the medication I was taking it did harm to my body in that area. I mean, he was my doctor, I should trust him right?!
Fast forward five years and I am about to get married to my first husband, I am at my stagette with my girlfriends having an amazing time, I am socially drinking alcohol.
A week later I am very sick, I had to the doctors, again someone I trust. I am told that I do have a throat infection and was given antibiotics. A coworker of mine thought I was pregnant, I laughed, for shits and giggles I asked the doctor for a pregnancy test, it was positive. My original doctor was wrong.
I immediately said this statement “I just drank a lot of alcohol at my stagette and have been drinking outside of that also” I was 6 weeks pregnant.
The doctors reply; “So many woman come in saying they were just drunk, it’s no big deal, your baby is fine”
I was not only dismissed by that doctor but then again by two Specialist OBGYN’s that I saw during my pregnancy. All three medical professionals dismissed the fact that I openly and honestly stated that I drank during my pregnancy and was concerned.
It was “no big deal” 😔
This is a very common situation for so many women. This cannot be the message that we are sending to women who are trying to have a baby or that are pregnant. My daughter was diagnosed at the age of 10 with FASD. So it was “a big deal”.
No amount of alcohol when pregnant is safe ❤️