Speaking Truth in Love

by Shannon Iacobacci, Collaborator
Sometimes as foster parents we find ourselves in situations we don’t understand or know how to navigate. The hardest one…our own personal feelings. We’ve signed up to care for kids that have suffered some form of abuse or neglect from the very people that are supposed to love and care for them. Their safety was compromised, and we have volunteered to help heal their wounds the best we can. We pour out our love for them, provide for them, and hold them close through emotional roller coasters when they come. And then what?
 
The family visits arrive, court dates occur, and it seems as if our “mama bear” mode kicks in. The question we need to ask ourselves is, “Am I feeling these feelings for my foster child and what they are going through, or because of my own selfish wants and needs?” It seems harsh to put it so directly, but we need to. We need to evaluate our own reasons for foster care. Are we...
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My Great Adventure

 

It was a few years ago when our family collectively decided to take a giant step and become a foster family. Our four children were leaving elementary school, and we all wanted to open our home to children who needed it. We were able to foster many children and care for them in their time of need. It was through this process our family adopted two more girls. During this time, we were noticing not only behavioral challenges with our little ones, but also our middle schoolers. We thought it may have been the adjustment of adding to the family, but there seemed to be more to it. We tried traditional parenting methods, but they seemed to make matters worse. Our family was literally beginning to fall apart.

Desperate for help and keeping our family unit intact, we sought help from professionals. Unfortunately, this added zero benefit for our struggling teens. We were left with multiple diagnoses, and a referral to therapy, which seemed to help in the beginning, but truly did not...

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